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"What
makes the toast pop up?"
Some children want to know how things work. The best way to find
out is to take it apart. That's curiosity, not destructiveness.
Let your child explore old locks in a drawer, broken dolls, a
box of junk…etc.
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"The
window moved!"
Then there are children whose brains and bodies don't seem to be
working together. They dash downstairs and bang into furniture,
throw a ball at the wall and break a window in the other
direction. It's not deliberate. Often it's just an unevenness in
development. Use patience and understanding to help them through
this time.
- "I sat
on it - but very gently!"
There are also the children who don't know their own strength,
and you've got the bent forks and wobbly end tables to prove it.
If so, it's important to protect these children as well as the
rest of the world. Children have to learn the social rules- for
example - what's appropriate indoors and outdoors. "No wrestling indoors", is a good rule. You may want
others. More importantly, find ways for them to work off energy.
Encourage play with other children in a playground, park or in
team sports.
- Once in a
while, destruction is deliberate.
Destruction usually involves more than one child. Children in a
group will do things they wouldn't dream of doing on their own.
Why? Blame it on youthful energy when there's nothing better to
do, and every child's desire at some point is to be accepted as
a part of a group. You can help your children face the
consequences of their behaviour by stressing the rights of
others and the cost of repairs - which they should help pay for.
- And there
are the children who, on their own, seem willfully destructive.
Unless handled with skill and understanding, their attitudes may
settle into a rut of defiance and destructiveness. Remember, the
outward behaviour is only a symptom of deeper worry, hurt or
anger. Try to find out why. The problem may have begun with one
or more worries such as problems at school, family fights or
feelings of loneliness. Don't be slow to seek help.
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Huron-Perth
Centre, Box 100 Clinton ON N0M 1L0
Clinton
(519) 482-3931 Listowel
(519) 291-1088 Stratford (519) 273-3373
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